Live, Learn, Love: Parenting Children With ASD

It’s the month of love, and this year, everyone gets to celebrate! Both children with autism and their caregivers should take some time this Valentine’s Day to show the people they care about how they feel in their own way.

Communication between kids with ASD and their caregivers can be difficult, because ASD often involves differences in communication and observation styles. For instance, a parent may feel loved by getting a warm hug from their child, but their child might not perceive that affection as a sign of love if they don’t like physical contact.

So this year, let’s learn how to understand each other a little bit better so we can be the most loving people we can be. Here’s how to live, learn, and love with your family members on the autism spectrum.

Live: How your life changes, how to keep it balanced

It can be challenging juggling the responsibilities as parent, spouse and work colleague. After several months of our children transitioning to virtual learning while we simultaneously work under the same roof, it is easy to get lost in the plethora of duties crowding into a single space.

But as every autism parent knows, patience and serenity are vital to being an effective guide and caregiver to children with ASD. So let's look at a few ways to make life at home peaceful and productive with your child on the autism spectrum. Here are a few ways to rediscover balance in your life to better support your child with ASD

Rely on your support network

It is important to remember that you are not alone in this. There are many pillars of support that accompany the journey as parents of children with autism.

Stay connected and communicative with people who can help you. Remember that you only have so much time and energy in the day and that you have to trust your peers and your own ability to delegate tasks.

Let’s focus on key components to our lives and how we can manage our time and energy through each.

-Work: Weigh your available options to work from home. If you can communicate with your peers to reallocate tasks for convenience, you might find that you can open up your work schedule without sacrificing your work hours or efficiency.

Be prepared to stand firm: you may have have less time hours or flexibility at work due to manage schedules for appointments with your child and involvement in their schooling. It's okay to ask for the time and flexibility from your workplace that you would be expected to provide in normal circumstances.

-School: Stay involved with your student’s progress by keeping in touch with their teachers. During normal times, we might have parent-teacher meetings, school events, and even opportunities to speak with teachers when picking our kids up from school. Since there are fewer opportunities in which to make contact with our kids' teachers nowadays, we need to make an active effort to get ahead of any problems they might be facing.

-Therapy: Be involved with your children's therapy. It is so important for ABA to be reinforced at home. As this 2021 study demonstrates, ABA needs at-home reinforcement to be effective. Quality parent training has already been demonstrated to be extremely effective during the pandemic. Some children with ASD were even able to continue their growth during quarantine despite the lack of ongoing ABA services due to the work of parents: with a firm understanding of ABA and the ability to practice the necessary skills, kids with ASD can flourish in any environment.

-Community support: surround yourself with peers who are sharing the same experiences as you.of the same experience. It’s already been shown that having a parent group can significantly reduce the stress common to parents with ASD. Joining a virtual parent support group is more important now than ever before. The other people that you will meet in support groups will have varied experiences to draw from. Let them be a resource for you!

LEARN: Continued learning

New findings from research initiatives bring forth great resources of knowledge in the studies of ASD. This means there’s always something new to learn. And yes, it can be overwhelming but with NESS at your side you will have the support that you need to better understand your child’s needs.

NESS Blog Corner

The NESS Blog Corner has a variety of articles written with you in mind! From helpful parenting tips to discovering new ASD friendly activities and tutorials, you are sure to find resources to keep you in the know!

NESS Library

The NESS Library is a great way to have ASD resources conveniently at your finger tips. Browse through the library in the comfort of your home and download content directly to your computer or mobile devices and take it with you on-the-go.

Parent Training

Here at NESS Behavior Consulting we offer 1:1 and group parent training. These services are a great addition to our ABA Therapy sessions as they provide an extra opportunity to practice procedures, monitor behavioral changes and witNESS your child's accomplishments with a better understanding.

Private Online NESS Community

As mentioned, it is important to surround yourself with peers throughout this journey. NESS offers a private community for parents and caregivers to share their experiences, directly from our website!

Join the community and gain access to these features by signing up for a NESS Membership today!

LOVE: How to show affection to children with ASD

Media portrayals of children on the autism spectrum tell us that they cannot express care and love in physical ways. It’s almost a cliche that kids with ASD can’t stand being hugged by family members.

But this can’t be true for one huge reason: everyone has a different experience with autism.

ASD is often accompanied by Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD), meaning that some people with autism are hypersensitive to sensations like texture, light, and smells. People with touch sensitivity might find physical affection, like hugging and cuddling, overwhelming and irritating.

It’s important to be respectful of the boundaries of children with hypersensitivity: after all, neurotypical people get sensory overload too. (Have you ever felt stressed with loud music playing nearby? Imagine that, but way more often.)

But what about kids with hyposensitivity? In contrast to those with hypersensitivity, hyposensitivity often causes people to crave sensory input, leading to behaviors like stimming. Autisable.com informs that children with hyposensitivity might need more hugging than others.

The most important advice to remember about affection is letting your child approach you first, (“How To Show Love To an Autistic Child” Sensory-Processing-Disorder.com) Sometimes affection is not about contact, but about showing the ones you love that you want to fulfill their emotional needs. If a smile or a compliment is enough to make your child feel loved and understood, they’ll feel comfortable enough to express affection in their own unique ways.

We look forward to hearing your experience of finding balance, implementing new practices and creating bonds with your children with ASD.